Thursday, December 16, 2010

my statement of faith as of 2010/12/16

It's a good idea to confess our faith and beliefs on God periodically and compare each to previous ones. Said the latter, without reading my previous statement of faith, I've written the following.

I believe in a (only one) God

  1. who's good and never cruel,
  2. who'll one day respond to my most important prayer,
  3. who'll someday heal my son and/or lead me to find a cure,
  4. who'll someday take away the suffering from my sick little boy,
  5. who'll be with my sick child after I die and/or give him a new carer,
  6. who's at the same time failed to protect my son and saw me holding my lifeless child (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/11/my-sons-first-ever-seizure.html),
  7. who's seen me break down and live my deepest pains for my sick child too many times,
  8. whom I've doubted many times in anger and despair if he'll ever heal my son (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/12/blue-christmas-mmx-finally-breaking.html),
  9. whom I still have faith that my son will be healthy once again (wishful, hopeful thinking),
  10. who still gives me strength to continue fighting for my son (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/12/blue-christmas-mmx-aftershock.html),

My original idea when writing this statement was to compare it against the first one I ever published (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/03/my-statement-of-faith-as-of-20100331-at.html), but I don't think it's good idea any more. I see I'm holding too much pain and anger right now. I might have simply changed for the worse as a Christian (lack of faith) and a person (more negative to humankind in general).