starting over: pizza diet, the diet of the (un)holy

During some of my toughest times (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/11/starting-over.html), I could only afford a slice or two of pizza and large cup of soda at most. Eating a piece of flat bread with tomato sauce and cheese with carbonated water made me lose lots of weight. Surprisingly I was healthy (thanks God).

Sometimes the worst of times brings the best of something although I'm not sure what. All I know is that it could have been much worse. Maybe that positive "thing" could have been much more if I had been going to a good church to maintain my mind and soul. Maybe it was a call that I might have failed or a test of endurance that I excelled in.

starting over

The whole idea of starting anew penniless scares most people. It's an old and beaten idea that makes me fairly uncomfortable. I've gone through it several times in my adult life and I've got no plans to go through it again (1991, 1993, 1995 & 2003).

Then again, the idea of moving to a new home or getting a new job can be seen as starting a new life. This is how I feel with my recent move to a new apartment and after changing banks. It's a new me -- at least with the same job, same debts, same little money left over from paycheck to paycheck, same old problems and fears.

Of course, the idea of starting over and becoming a truly good person does sound attracting, but I often fall back to my old self. It's hard to unlearn bad habits and be a better person. Maybe I need to hang out much more time in church.

pledge campaign

As a means to give back to God what he's given us, we make our offers and tithes (10% of income; http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/05/to-tithe-or-not-to-tithe-yet-never.html). The church as a building needs to be maintained (utilities, ministries, supplies, etc; as estimated budget of $2.5 million). Hence we're asked to help and pledge for a present and future offering. As much I'd like to give back as much as I've been given, it's tough for me to do so with my limited resources. I have to support my children and pay back bills and other moneys. At the end of the fortnight, I'm flat broke and it just doesn't feel right. At the same time, my children have what they need or at least do my best to give them everything they need. Hence by doing my best can be good enough for my boys as a father -- yet not as a Christian.

to tithe or not to tithe... yet never enough

The Bible says that we should give 10% of the gifts that God has given us back to God -- well actually to the church for its outreach ministries especially and to cover other monetary obligations (rent, utilities, taxes, etc). In a modern world, this means 10% of our income. In other words, we must return a dime for every dollar, a dollar for every ten, ten for every hundred, a hundred for every thousand. Well you get the idea.

Said the latter, each of my boys should give a dime for every dollar I give them for sweets or such goodies. Honestly I don't think they would be thrilled by the idea.

The problem is what to do when one's money is spent in personal debts, medical expenses and such (90 to 95%). Can a person do both -- tithe and take care of himself and family while living paycheck to paycheck?

Most people in this latter scenario would cover his own expenses especially when dealing with family and/or medical expenses. Why do I bring this up? I don't have enough money (sometimes any left over) to tithe after expenses on my children and medical expenses, neither of which is optional. I merely give what I can -- a set dollar amount every week. Yet I know this isn't enough, never enough.