my son's first ever seizure, my dying son?

As much as doctors and others tell me that my son will be fine (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/12/my-sons-first-ever-seizure-my-sons-last.html), I still feel that a part of my son died that night (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/11/my-sons-first-ever-seizure.html). He seems to have been affected as his over all behavior's changed negatively. He's become more irritable, hyper, depressed, acting "crazy" and even dangerously reckless. I don't want him to end up taking antidepressants and/or anti-psychotics (like I do).

Maybe I'm stupidly exaggerating, but I've got a bad feeling in my mind that all these so-called experts aren't being fully honest with me. Could a next seizure or any other medical incident kill him or leave him in a comma or some other vegetative state? This isn't the type of thoughts that a parent should have. I should be worried about his grades, school and/or any troubles children are expected to do.

Needless to say (type), being so worried and afraid is taking a huge toll on my mental health falling in and out of depression (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/12/blue-christmas-mmx-finally-breaking.html) or anxiety. I hope my mind's just making a sick joke on me. Nevertheless, at the end of the day, I still wonder if there's anything I could do to stop my son's health from deteriorating more. If anyone cares to know, I love my son and I'm scared to death for his health, quality of life and his life in general (any possibility of death, vegetative state, etc).

For now, at least, my son might have to spend a night or two in a hospital for an EEG and whatever other test the neurologist orders. This means that I'd have to take a couple days from work and be by his side. All I know is that he'll be bored and in a rotten mood.

For some reason, I had the stupid idea of sending an email like the text above to my mother. She responded first thing this morning. One part of her email said that my son came to earth to accomplish a task -- allowing me to be a father to him. Hence if he were to die from any or all his medical condition or simply at a young age, I'd have an angel in heaven. This statement absolutely sucks!

IN ALL, I JUST HOPE I'M STUPIDLY BLOODY WRONG!

angels in the city

Since it's the Christmas (not holiday) season, I wanted to mention the angels in my hometown (NYC). There two main types of "angels" in the city -- one of them being the Guardian Angels and the other being the Hell Angels (actually a chapter of a larger group).

The Guardian Angels were (maybe still are) a group of civilians who'd patrol the streets and subway system "helping" the NYPD. They'd put order maybe not in the best politically correct manner, but the means justified the "peace" they'd bring.

The Hell Angels are a just bikers with a cool name.

As you can see, even in the toughest city in the world, angels still abide.

hell & demons, heaven & angels: mea culpa

I guess I should answer my own questions.

Does believing in hell, demons or the devil mean that I believe in Heaven, angels and therefore God?

Do I believe in (1) hell, (2) demons, (3) the devil, (4) Heaven, (5) angels and/or (6) God?

http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/11/hell-demons-heaven-angels.html

I believe in hell as eternal torment and terror (highest level of fear). Whatever that torment and terror may be. I also believe in demons and the devil as part of hell.

At the same time, I believe in Heaven as the Kingdom of God, as the reward for those who are clean of sin (in grace). I believe in angels as those souls who serve God in Heaven, especially the concept of guardian angels as the personal steward each one of us has been granted with. Needless to say, I believe in one God -- regardless of the name (Jehovah, Allah, Krishna, Ra, etc), meaning, concept or definition given by humans.

I don't know what to believe about concepts like the purgatory and saints (early Church martyrs or not) -- other than being concepts created by men.

Believing in hell and its horrors does influence my belief of Heaven. I need either some sort of balance in the cosmos (good vs evil; yin and yang, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yin_and_yang) or to justify the horrors I've lived (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/09/as-my-soul-ran-away-at-night-every.html). As I usually say, I've been in and out (the horrors of) hell. Hence if hell exists, Heaven must do too.

hell & demons, heaven & angels

Does believing in hell, demons or the devil mean that we believe in Heaven, angels and therefore God?

Maybe this isn't quite a question that many want to touch. Some believe in a Godhead, but not in hell. Some believe in evil (hell, demons, etc), but not in a god -- at least the God we know. These are six different elements that I just threw in a single question. Maybe the best alternative would be breaking my original question in six separate parts. Do you believe in (1) hell, (2) demons, (3) the devil, (4) Heaven, (5) angels and/or (6) God? You're welcome to share your answers sending them me via my Twitter account (@Project05952381).

Going back to my original question, there are groups of Christians who believe in all these six elements. These Christians (mostly Catholics) believe in eternal damnation (the devil, demons and hell) as a punishment if God doesn't find us clean from sin. At the same time, if God does find us clean from sin (in grace), we'd be welcomed in Heaven where God resides with the angels and saints.

So if you're a Christian, you most likely believe in and/or follow the Christ (Jesus), but what else do you believe in? If you need help answering, read the following article.

Many Americans Mix Multiple Faiths
http://pewforum.org/Other-Beliefs-and-Practices/Many-Americans-Mix-Multiple-Faiths.aspx