Thursday, December 2, 2010

my son's first ever seizure, 24/7

As soon as I leave work, I run home to be with my son ( I've got him under constant observation to avoid any more surprises (especially another seizure). It's practically an obsessive exaggeration, but I don't want any more surprises. The idea of losing my boy scares me to death. Besides, I keep asking myself many questions.

  1. What'd have happened if we wouldn't have noticed that my little boy was having a tonic-clonic seizure that left him unconscious for about twenty minutes?

  2. Could the seizure have killed him or caused any level of brain damage (sedated routine EEG on 12/22/2010)?

  3. Has he ever had a seizure or ever been unconscious before during his sleep that we'd never noticed? Worse yet, has he ever had any level of seizure before even if not visible to others (including us at home)?

  4. Will he go through a second seizure or worse yet several more? If so, would my child be as lucky?

  5. How could anyone -- especially my little boy -- have a seizure while sleeping and become unconscious right after without a chance to wake up?

  6. What'd happen if he were to have another seizure at school? Would these people even know what to do?

  7. Does he even understand what happened to him and why he's been at two hospitals this week alone? Is he afraid?

  8. Is it our fault? Did we do something or fail to do something that could've avoided the seizure?

  9. How could this whole experience be affecting my two-year-old? Is he also prompt to having a seizure?

  10. How much can prayer and faith really help heal my son (repair his fragile and broken little body)? Are they both merely a way to cope with the pain and desperation? Are they the key to heal my son or stop his body from failing again?

I'm just afraid and worried as any parent who's held his/her child motionless, unconscious and limb as if he was dead.

Oh God, please heal my boy (thanks)!