Friday, December 3, 2010

my son's first ever seizure, such a long week

It's been a long week in the aftermath of my nine-year-old having a seizure (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/11/my-sons-first-ever-seizure.html). Many things have changed in the way I see life as it's now even more fragile than ever.

That night, I felt as if I was losing him again -- first to disease that no one cares to understand and now to this seizure with all its possible consequences. For example (hopefully not really an example), his brain seems to have been affected (hopefully a mere stupid hyperbole). He's violently moody, highly irritable, crying for no apparent reason (perhaps some level depression, anxiety) and senselessly giggling. His attention span seems to have dropped too -- barely looking me in the eye when I talk to him -- as if his adrenal system was completely shot (fight/flight all the time).

He's also got lots of coughing before and after seizure since he had trouble breathing right before the seizure. Of course, no one gives me direct answer if this coughing could be related to the seizure or not. Hopefully it's simply the result of his allergies (to wheat especially). Needless to say (type), I become worried every time he coughs.

How much longer can I hold on to my faith BEFORE DOUBTING INDEFINITELY?