rants: fire & brimstone

According to the program "Gates of Hell" on the History Channel, different societies have believed that the entrance to hell's here on earth -- emphasizing on the three-tier belief adopted by Christianity that Heaven's above us (sky), earth's where we live and hell's underneath us (magma, center of earth).

One thing that emphasized on this two-hour program's that Christianity's based lots of its traditions (scaring, converting people, etc) in the concept of damnation (fire, punishment in the flesh, eternal suffering, etc; yet psychological torture hardly mentioned).

I've got no doubt that hell exists. I believe that I've gone through the horror of hell many times in my life and come back just to feel them many times again (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/09/as-my-soul-ran-away-at-night-every.html).

Nonetheless I don't think it's a place underneath the earth's crust. I believe that it's a spiritual place where souls are tortured.

restless me, always burning adrenaline

I remember when I first heard this word. I might have been in the second or third grade and I knew the textbook definition. It was good enough for spelling quizzes and tests at the time, but I couldn't understand the concept of not having (lacking, being without) rest. Several years later, I've come to understand the concept of not being able to rest (hyperactivity, worries, etc) regardless how tired I could be at any given point -- always burning adrenaline like a drag-racer burning fuel on a asphalt track to nowhere. Hence I get bored easily and need constant stimulation (watching TV, listening to music, etc). Perhaps the general need for stimulation triggers my mind to function continuously thinking, worrying, reading and/or writing (as in the case of all the material that you can see that I produce every day). It's awkwardly difficult for me to rest. As a matter of fact, I don't really know how to rest other than getting myself so tired that I practically pass out -- just as a priest told me (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/09/as-my-soul-ran-away-at-night-every.html). In all, I'm total mess -- as if anyone cares.

animals, better than men

Considering the fact that humans are also animals yet above other animals thanks to our intelligence, irrational animals are kinder and much more honest (hence better). Even the most vicious beast's more sincere. It doesn't pretend to like you. It just wants to eat you alive or simply kill you (no gimmicks, no lies).

We consider ourselves much better since we possess a better (or sole, depending whom you ask) capacity to think. This conscience defines what humans are in general giving us the capacity to have a spirit and/or soul. We're just too selfish thinking that humans are the only creatures who'd inherit Heaven.

In Krishna, all living creatures fulfill an obligation -- the will of the Godhead. Hence each creature depends on all others for a common purpose or divine plan. This belief makes much more sense than all the crap we hear everywhere else.

Well where am I going with all this? For many years, I've been kinder to irrational animals rather than to humans (rational animals). Perhaps this is why I compare those humans I love to monkeys, dogs or other faithful animals.

In part, my respect and love to animals is why I'm a vegetarian. The other part's my health and unhealthy digestive system, which was the primary reason yet has become secondary.

By the way, my nine-year-old rode a horse for the first time yesterday. He enjoyed it. He also seemed to appreciate the service this animal offered him (calmness, freedom, being one with nature, etc).

witchcraft

I grew up seeing and believing in witchcraft. Maybe being part Italian didn't help not believing in the occult, evil eye, spells, cleansing of spells, possession, ghosts, demons and other crap like that. Crystal balls, Tarot, oils, good luck charms, fortune telling, using the Bible for evil (witchcraft using the name of God) and something similar to voodoo were things I saw growing up. Part of family practiced several of these acts. As a matter of fact, to make matters worse, Christianity is tainted with the occult and other pagan beliefs. In several parts of the world, Christianity and witchcraft go hand in hand. The worst part of all this is that I've actually witnessed this. Maybe I was simply born evil or from evil nature.

as my soul ran away at night, every night

As a child, I was afraid of sleeping thinking I'd die as soon as falling asleep. This may sound weird, but several times a week I'd feel a terrifying sensation. It felt as if something would rush out of my body tearing me inside in a sound similar to a loud jet airplane during that split second where one's half awake and entering full paralysis of the body. Hence I was fully conscious, but I couldn't move or control my body (merely a mind, a soul, a spirit trapped in what was practically a corpse for a few eternal minutes).

The only way to break these strange occurrences was forcing myself to move my paralyzed body and scream. To say the least, screaming in terror (past the point of fear and horror) in the middle of night afraid to die then and there was enough to practically wake up the dead.

At some point, I started thinking that it was my soul leaving my body. Was I at that point stop my soul from leaving? I hated considering that my soul could leave my body while being fully conscious leaving an empty husk of a body behind.

At some other point in time, I even thought that I was experiencing the horrors of hell. Well I still don't know and perhaps I might never know.

One thing that helped me when I was in high school (15-17) was talking to the priest of the church I used to go to with my best friend. This priest seemed to understand what I was going through. He even asked me if I believed in witchcraft/sorcery (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/09/witchcraft.html), to which I agreed, and he asked me never to practice it. He also told me to go to sleep tired and so I've tried to do since.

These episodes would come and go several years at a time. I've never known when they'd come or when they'd stop. In all, this has been a part of my life since I was at least eight (8). Eventually the frequency of these events has diminished, but never stopped. I haven't had an episode in several years, but I know it could happen again.

Mork from Ork

I remember watching Mork & Mindy (ABC 1978-82; http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0077053/) with Robin Williams (Mork; http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000245/) and Pam Dawber (Mindy; http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001118/) when I was a kid. There was a particular episode, in which Mork traveled to another world (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0651242/). In this trip, his mind went into another being's body and that being into that of Mork. Vacationing was as simple as mind swapping.

This is one of those stories that reminds me of the belief that the soul inhabits in a body (person) -- considering the argument that the mind, the spirit and the soul are the same. Of course, we're taught to believe that we all have souls and these are eternal. At the same time, there are many (not necessarily Christian) stories of souls "walking" the earth, which we'd normally refer to as ghosts. As Christians, we believe that the latter is true. There are some who even believe that the soul escapes from or simply wanders off the body while asleep (http://project05952381.blogspot.com/2010/09/as-my-soul-ran-away-at-night-every.html).

Going back to Mork & Mindy, it'd be so cool for our minds (souls) to leave our bodies and travel of course returning to our bodies when returning from holiday.

By the way, I'm going to rent the whole series. I've got font memories of staying at my maternal grandmother's flat weeks at a time watching this show in my old beat-up portable (handle on the top) 13" b/w TV set.

without the spirit

Common ideology and theology can be tricky and sometimes hard to accept to say the least.

"Civilization is static unless there is spiritual movement. The soul moves the body, and the living body moves the world. We are concerned about the body, but we have no knowledge of the spirit that is moving that body. Without the spirit, the body is motionless, or dead."
-- "Science of Self Realization"
by His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada

After reading this quote of one of my favorite books, most would think that the author of such book is some sort of Judeo-Christian theologian, philosopher or at least writer. The use of the word "spirit" is so loose in religion that it may refer to the Holy Spirit (Christianity), the spirit of God, a person's soul as a synonym, a ghost or other life force. Hence a Christian might conclude that the author refers to the Holy Spirit. We could understand it as, "Without the [Holy Spirit], the body is motionless, or dead."

The text above is actually from my favorite book on Krishna -- "Science of Self Realization" by His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada (http://www.iskcon.org/).

The concept of the Godhead is shared by many religions. It was actually reading this book that I understood that all living creatures exist to accomplish a common will of God.

"We living entities, being parts and parcels of God, are dutybound to serve Him."
-- "Science of Self Realization"
by His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada

This common concept explains our function in God's creation. Of course, there are other details in Krishna that don't apply to the three Abrahamic religions (Judaism, Christianity and Islam). Hence I'm not interested to talk about them here.

At the same time, in the same book we can see the common belief that we must accept God in our lives.

"God is there, and we can see Him at every moment. If we refuse to see God in our life, then He will be present before us as cruel death. If we do not choose to see Him in one feature, we will see Him in another."
-- "Science of Self Realization"
by His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada

Once again, it may feel confusing to understand that these quotes that I'm using here are Krishna -- a religion that we -- Christians -- tend to see as Pagan or even ungodly. Of course, at the end of the day there's only one God and we -- humans -- have given Him different names. Then again, Christianity may be derived from the same core concepts of a common ancient and forgotten religion or mere group of beliefs. This latter can be highly rejected by many, but understood by those who aren't too blind or stubborn.